Nativity Catholic Church
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Remembering Our First Kiss
A "FIRESTARTER" Spiritual Essay by Rev.
Dr. Benjamin
Berinti, C.Pp.S.
No matter the source of the prompting, human beings have a general tendency to want to “look back” and to recover things we feel have become lost in the rapid shuffle of newness that our culture insists we keep pace with. We tire so easily in our pursuit of the “new”; its frenetic pace simply wearing us down in body and spirit. Consequently, we find it much easier to go backwards, to slow the pace by figuratively turning back the clock and recouping something of our left-behind past—whether it be some sentimental music, a style of home décor, the fabrics and colors we wear, or the way we celebrate a family holiday. In these and so many other ways, nostalgia, retro, or whatever you wish to call it, provides us with a way of managing an ever-increasing tension and elusiveness that seems inherent in our daily lives. Uncertain as to what the “new” is all about, or more accurately, how long the “new” will actually last (by the time most can afford the “new & improved,” it’s already “old and worn out”!)—we feel more secure in laying hold of things familiar, secure, knowable, sturdy, and “experienced.” After paging through an old photo album filled with nostalgic recollections from my childhood, I came across a photo of what had to be my first kiss—a kiss, that is, that was not planted on a parent or close relative! I mean a real, heart-felt, sappy, tingly, do-it-because-you-feel-funny-inside kind of kiss. Upon discovery of the picture, my first thought was—better get rid of this thing! Who knows where it might show up one day—especially if someone from the parish gets the brilliant idea (as a bunch of people did back when I celebrated my 40th birthday several years ago—plastering the Parish Center walls with photos of me all sudsy in my baby bassinet) to make this piece of nostalgia available to the general public—all, of course, under the guise of showing the “tender side” of the pastor! Yet, while gazing at the photo, and clearly remembering whom the young woman was (Susie Grimm—a neighbor of my grandparents), I began to reminisce about the meaning of a “first kiss.” I am sure, despite the “photo op” that it became (who knows where the paparazzi were hiding that day), that it was meant to be a secretive, “stolen” moment…something filled with such a rush of joy and excitement that it was too much to handle in public, out in the open. Some experiences are like that—we are so overcome, overwhelmed by our feelings and emotions that we think we have to “secret” them away somewhere out of sight. I am also certain, in spite of the rather calm and cool pose I happened to strike in the photo with Susie, there was an overriding feeling of discomfort, or perhaps better said, awkwardness. This also seems to be the case with many things of importance in our lives—so often we feel awkward doing things or sharing things that have deep meaning for us (just think about how uncomfortable many Catholics are with their bodies during Eucharist and worship—something we value so deeply, yet we feel rather awkward giving “too much” bodily expression to our praise of God. Even the “liturgical police” in the Vatican say that we should be offering the “Sign/Kiss of Peace” at Mass in a “somber manner”—yikes!) Despite the embarrassment, the sense of being overwhelmed with a rush of emotions, the awkwardness, the experience of one’s “first kiss” stands as one of those significant turning points in life, one of those moments when we recognize we are coming into our own, that we are able to influence the world around us, that we are able to reach out to another human being who is not a blood relative and to share an intimate part of ourselves. Indeed, while I’d prefer that the photo never get into the hands of potential “blackmailers,” the photo has served the purpose of allowing me to reach back into a significant moment of my life, and to allow this past experience to awaken something in the present—the power and beauty of a kiss! Leonard Ira Sweet, in his book Quantum Spirituality: A Postmodern Apologetic (Dayton, Whaleprints, 1991)—wow, that’s a mouthful for a book title—speaks about a “first kiss” too. Only his recollection, his retro account explores not a stolen moment in the backyard with a neighbor friend, nor a star lit night at Junior Prom, but rather a moment at the beginning of time. Leonard Sweet reminisces about the “first kiss” planted upon humankind through the breath of our Creator God! Listen to and ponder Sweet’s words: The human species has been twice kissed by the divine. If the first kiss brought us breath and birth, the second kiss brought us rebirth and a second breath (298). The “first kiss” to which Sweet refers is the moment, recounted in the Creation narrative of Genesis when God kissed and breathed upon Adam, made “in the image and likeness of God.” The “second kiss,” of which he speaks so eloquently, is when Jesus kissed and breathed the Holy Spirit upon the frightened apostles and disciples in the Upper Room, following his death and resurrection: ‘Peace be with you!’ When he had said this, he showed them his hands and his side. The disciples rejoiced when they saw the Lord. Jesus said to them again, ‘Peace be with you. As the Father has sent me, so I send you.’ And when he had said this, he breathed on them and said to them, ‘Receive the Holy Spirit’ (John 20:19b-22). Leonard Sweet puts it this way: “The first kiss of God quickened us to come alive. Adam was God’s first kiss. The second kiss of God quickens us to come alive in Christ and be ‘born of the Spirit’ (John 3:8). Jesus is God’s second kiss (299).” What a magnificent perspective! What a nostalgia, a turning back that’s worth remembering—and bringing to bear on this moment of our lives! Perhaps, when we contemplate God kissing us, we have those same feelings of discomfort, embarrassment, being overwhelmed, or awkwardness. Yet, what a joy and a comfort to know that we are loved, or as Henri Nouwen would put it: that we are the BELOVED of God!
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